Age Defying Makeup

I am sure that many of you have met my friend Bri. Bri recently went back to college to finish up her degree after taking a few years off. She is all set to graduate in May. Because she lives in a small college town she spends a lot of time with people that are just a few years younger than her. Bri is the baby of our group of friends at 24 years old.

Bri mentioned to one of her fellow students (I will call him Goober) that her birthday is coming up next month.
Goober asked Bri how old she will be.
She replied that she is turning 25.
Goober looked at her very seriously and asked "Do you wear age defying makeup?"

Goober - are you effing kidding me?
She is going to be 25 for Christ’s sake!
Most 24 year olds do NOT have wrinkles or liver spots or anything like that!
They don't need age defying makeup!
And how do you even know about age defying makeup?
What man between the ages of 18 and 22 would even know that age defying makeup exists?
You watch too much TV and pay too much attention to the commercials.
Don't you have a TiVo? Do you live in the freaking Stone Age?
And by the time you are in college you should know not to ask stupid questions like "How old are you?" and "Do you wear age defying makeup?"
I am afraid there is no hope for you Goober!