Friday, May 12, 2006

Dear Warren Jeffs,

Does your whole family look like a bunch of child molesters or what? Oh, that's right, you are! You are also a hateful, racist, con artist.


Rulon Jeffs with 2 of his wives (left) & Warren Jeffs (right)

Hey, guess what Warren? The FBI is finally coming after you! Yay FBI! It's about time!

Everyone knows what the FLDS is all about. We all know that for the past four years you have been repeatedly molesting children; just like we knew that your father was molesting children for at least 15 years before that. With the exception of the one previous raid on your compound, our government has allowed this to go on for over two decades. That raid didn't really do anything. All they did was arrest the men. What they need to do this time is take the children too. Otherwise the men get out of jail, come home and keep up the same routine of excommunicating the adolescent boys so that the young girls are available to the old, sick, perverted men like you.

The other thing the government needs to do is find a way to educate those children. Even if a child decides they want to leave your compound, where are they going to go and what are they going to do with a sixth or eighth grade education? You have done an excellent job of trapping over 10,000 people and making them think that they are staying on their own. I think most educated people would agree that a prophet who has never been correct in any of his predictions is not a prophet at all; you are just a con artist.

I believe that three things have forced the government's action on this.

  1. The book Under the Banner of Heaven, A Story of Violent Faith by Jon Krakauer. See previous post about this book.
  2. The same-sex marriage civil rights fight. The original law states that a marriage is a union between one man and one woman. Because we are taking away the man/woman part, shouldn't we also take away the one/one part? I support same sex marriages and I might also support polygamy if it didn't involve children. Just because I don't agree with marrying multiple people doesn't give me the right to say that way of life should be illegal.
  3. The HBO show Big Love. Now I think this was the straw that broke the camel's back. I am not sure if they modeled the show after your family and compound or if it is just a shocking coincidence. Lets take a look at some of the similarities and differences:
  • Villain Name:
    Real Life: Rulon Jeffs & Warren Jeffs
    Big Love: Roman Grant
  • Church Trust Name:
    Real Life: United Effort Plan (UEP)
    Big Love: United Effort Brotherhood (UEB)
  • Compound Name:
    Real Life: Colorado City, AZ
    Big Love: Juniper Creek, UT
  • Estimated number of wives:
    Real Life: Rulon Jeffs (50-75) & Warren Jeffs (100 +)
    Big Love: Roman Grant (14)

Did you ever wonder why the FBI cracked down so hard on the Mob and just let your United Effort Plan flourish for the past two decades? When your assets were finally seized, the UEP was estimated to be worth over 100 MILLION dollars!

Your communities of Colorado City and Hildale have a welfare rate that is many times the national average. The government is supporting your sect! That's right, my hard earned tax dollars are paying for the many "unwed mothers" that actually live in a nice 15,000 square foot, 25 bedroom house with no mortgage at all because your UEP owns everything. They have a "husband" who takes care of them and their children, but because that "marriage" is not legally recognized, they can take and take and take from funds like welfare. I bet you aren't really up to date on your taxes are you?

I think this thing is going to go down like another Waco. I don't think that you will be taken alive because I am sure you know how they treat child molesters in prison and I think that would be an informal death sentence for you. So go for it Warren, do us all a favor, save us the cost of putting you through a lengthy trial, as soon as you see the SWAT team roll in just grab your gun and wave it around in the air!

Sincerely,
Ash, Concerned Citizen and Angry American

Related posts:
Warren Jeffs: It sucks to be you! - 8/29/06
Snake Bite Key ("Another Book" section) - 2/19/06

More information:
Wikipedia: Warren Jeffs
Wikipedia: FLDS
NPR: Warren Jeffs and the FLDS

1 comment:

Nuclear Toast said...

Dr. Evil says, "one hundred meeeelyun dollars!"