Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Ladies Night

What do you get when you mix 3 ladies, 4 bottles of champagne, some wine and some vodka? This night:

Bri, CK and I celebrated ladies night - or as my husband calls it, Dirty Ho Night - on Friday. We had a great time.

We started out at my house with a round of champagne and then went to the hotel that we booked and drank more champagne. Then it was off to the Crab Pot for dinner and drinks and then over to the hot tub (yes, the one we have permission to use, not the one we have to jump the fence for) for more champagne and some vodka. That might be a little out of order but it's close and my recall is a little fuzzy - must have been all those bubbles in the champagne.

After getting out of the hot tub we were in no shape to drive so we left the car and headed out on foot to my house to check on my husband because he had knee surgery a week earlier and I wanted to make sure that he hadn't fallen and if he had that he wasn't stuck on the ground like in those commercials. Ladies – yes I know checking on your husband is a big no-no and totally goes against the point of ladies night but I figured we could make an exception because of the surgery. Bri said to make an excuse like “I forgot my contact solution” but I didn’t.

We arrive at my house and we all stumble in and check on DK. He was watching TV and in good condition. Bri did a little dance for him, talked some gibberish and we grabbed a lantern and a few drinks for the road.

There is a trail that connects my neighborhood to the main road in town where the hotel is so we headed off down the trail with our lantern and roadie-soadies as my Canadian friend calls drinks to go. By this time it’s about 1:30 or so.

I have 3 problems when I get drunk:
1) Doing doughnuts in parking lots. (I quit doing this since it is bad to be behind the wheel of a car even in a deserted parking lot after drinking.)
2) Breaking things on purpose, usually glass bottles. (Not in an angry way, just because breaking things is fun!)
3) Mooning people and cars.

As we make our way to the hotel I start mooning passing cars because hey – it’s fun and I am drunk. I moon a few cars and they would honk or hoot at me and it was all in good fun. Then I see another car about a block away and I am getting ready to drop trou when I notice that it has what appear to be lights on the top of it. Once it was a little closer, about a half a block away I could see it clearly – a cop. Luckily I noticed it before exposing my bright white ass to Officer What’sHisName and ditched my drink in the bushes. He didn’t even stop and we continued on to the hotel for a good nights sleep.

We arrive at the hotel and we are walking to our room and Bri lost her balance and CRASHED into someone else’s door with a LOUD bang.

The next morning we woke up still drunk and feeling like shit. Bri and I decide to go down to the continental breakfast room for a snack. All we wanted was a bagel. Do they have bagels? No. They have a bagel cutter and cream cheese but no bagels. So we settled for waffles, the kind your make yourself on the flipping waffle iron. Bri’s waffle didn’t turn out so well and she was mangling it trying to get it out of the waffle iron. We were laughing so hard and we just couldn’t stop. Everyone, especially this one grumpy lady was staring at us and some 10 year old girl was trying to explain to us how to get the waffle out of the waffle iron.



Small Fish said...

You guys are retarded.

bladio said...