Dear Santa,

Here is what I would like for Christmas. I have been really good all year.

• Coupon organizer


• Compass Jones chapter 36


• 8 person hot tub


• Small boat (that floats and has a motor that works.)


• Cheese


• Mac & cheese


• Cheese sauce


• Nachos


• Quesadilla (remember... no carrots or broccoli!!!)


• Winning lotto ticket


• Monkey (a friendly one that doesn't bite or throw poo.)


• 2 Alpacas


• Chinchilla


• 1976 - 78 Trans Am


• World peace


• A president who speaks English


• PJ's with feet

Camel Toad

Bri from The Chronicles of A Nini emailed this to me. I told her to blog it, but she is on vacation so she asked me to blog it for her.

One word: HILARIOUS!

(Click to enlarge)

Gym Update - 12/17/07

Ok - I am a total slacker. I only went to the gym ONCE last week. Oops!

Yuckadilla

Today I ordered takeout from Azteca. When I get Mexican takeout and eat at my desk, I usually get a quesadilla (no meat) with a side of rice and beans.

I really like nachos better, but they are messy and I can’t work and eat them at the same time because I would get beans and cheese grease all over my keyboard and mouse. Nasty!

I called in my order just like I always do. Here is a rough transcript of my call.

Azteca lady: Ello, tank you for calling Azteca Redman.
Me: Hi, can I make a to-go order please?
Azteca lady: Yez, one minat…
Azteca lady: K, what can I get you?
Me: Can I please have a cheese quesadilla, no meat with a half side order of both rice and beans?
Azteca lady: No meat? Yez?
Me: Right, no meat.
Azteca lady: k – it ready in tin minat.
Me: Ok – thanks.
Azteca lady: Bye.
Me: Bye.
End of call.

I hop in my car, drive to Azteca, pick up my bag of food and drive back to my office. Yum! I can hardly wait! I get to my desk and start opening the take out containers. The rice looks good – the beans look great – they gave me a big bag of chips with extra salsa – guacamole and sour cream: check.

W-T-F is this? My quesadilla is in a whole wheat tortilla and stuffed with broccoli and carrots! WTF?!!?!? Ahhhhhgggggggghhhhhhhggggg! I like all of these ingredients, JUST NOT TOGETHER - IN MEXICAN FOOD! When I order a cheese quesadilla, I expect cheese and tortilla and maybe a touch of pico de gallo*! Not fucking garden vegetables! Does “no meat” really mean “load that fucker up with vegetables and other healthy shit”? Do they think that because I don’t eat meat that I need some extra broccoli and carrots in my diet? Do they assume that because I don’t eat meat I would want a whole wheat tortilla? I was so disappointed.

* Totally unrelated to the story, but did you know that pico de gallo means “rooster's beak” in Spanish. Huh? What’s up with that?!?!

I call them back and explain that I think I got the wrong thing. They were very nice and said to come back and they would quickly fix a NORMAL quesadilla. I was happy with that. I put the untouched yuckadilla in the kitchen with a post-it note on it saying that if someone wanted it they could take it and someone took it! I was kind of surprised but to each his own.

Gym Update - 12/10/07

I went to the gym 3 times last week.

Burt Builds a Bandit

I want one of these sooooooo bad! It's really my childhood dream.


Burt Builds a Bandit - 1

Snow, wind, rain - STOP!

Yikes! This weather sucks!

On Saturday DK and I were wine tasting all day in Woodinville. It started to snow in the afternoon and that was fun & exciting. Everything looks so pretty covered in snow. I was so excited! I couldn’t imagine a better day than drinking good wine with my wonderful husband and watching the snow fall all around us. The novelty soon wore off when it was time to drive home after dinner. By that time there must have been 4 inches of snow on the roads. To say the least it was an eventful trip.

I put the Pathfinder in 4-Low for the 15 mile drive home. As we were getting on the 522 in Woodinville I lost control on the ramp and ended up facing the wrong direction. Yikes. I got back on track and kept on going. We approached the ramp for the 405 south; you may know the one, it must be 2 stories or more above the freeway. We were inching along, shocked by all the cars on the guardrail or the few that had spun out and were facing in the wrong direction. All of a sudden the Pathfinder starts sliding sideways towards the guardrail. Luckily we hit a section that didn’t already have a car on it and we were only going a few miles per hour. I have never been up-close and personal with a guardrail before but I was pleased to learn that they have a little concrete curb on them so if you hit them with the side of your car, completely parallel like I did, that little curb hits your tires first and keeps the body of your car from hitting the actual concrete and metal rail. (*See diagram below.) Awesome! Disaster averted! We drove the rest of the way home going 25-30 on the 405. I was really happy to get home.

On Sunday I was out wine tasting again with Bri. The roads where clear but it was dumping rain. We had a great time and later met the husbands in Bellevue for dinner. At dinner DK told me that it was really windy at our house. At one point he heard a banging noise. An hour or so later he realized that we had left the mudroom door unlocked and the wind BLEW it open! Holy crap! He walked out the door to find our two cats (who are NOT allowed outside - ever) sniffing around our garden shed! I am so glad he found them! I guess they knew they weren’t supposed to be out there because they ran back into the house on their own without DK even having to chase them down. I suspect that a short time in the wind and rain was too much for our spoiled little babies.

The rain is still pouring down and as of this morning our driveway has turned into a pond and the mini-horse farm near our house no longer has pasture land, it has a lake!

Gym Update - 12/3/07

I went to the gym 3 times last week.

December Announcements

Happy Birthday to:
BB - 12/6
Fuzzy - 12/24
SG - 12/29
Oafie - 12/31